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Oh What Grief We Bare

Upland, CA — During one of my Wisdom Wednesdays With Coach Wendy show on Instagram, we talked about the struggle many people are facing with grief.  Grief is the response to loss. The reality is we cannot go through our lives without experiencing some loss.  The loss may be physical (such as a death), social/relational (such as divorce), or occupational (such as a job). Unfortunately, grief is something most of us will experience at one time or another during our lifetime.  Because grief is a highly individual experience, we respond to it in different ways. Some people respond to it emotionally and display anger, guilt, anxiety, sadness, and despair. Others respond to it physically and display sleeping problems, changes in appetite, physical problems, or illness. From personal experience I know grief can take you places you never expected to go, and keep you longer than you ever planned to stay.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve or a typical timetable. Grief cannot be forced or rushed, but there are healthy ways to deal with the grieving process. Here are the Five Stages of grief:

Denial

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Acceptance

Healing happens gradually and not everyone has to go through all these stages or have them happen in any order. However, if you feel stuck keep pushing forward it will get better.   

Many of you might know that I have written books about forgiveness, and I see there are some similarities in the healing process with both grief and forgiveness. To come to terms with both and move on with your life here are some things you must do: 

Acknowledge your pain or anger, do not avoid it.

Seek help or support because you do not have to suffer in silence.

You must support yourself physically and emotionally.

Your grief or pain is your own, do not let anyone tell you how to feel.

COVID-19 has caused so much grief exponentially beyond anything we can even imagine. To date 565,000 in the U.S. have died. Feelings of loss, sadness, anxiety, loneliness, regret, anger, and guilt have been compounded during this crisis. We will have to help each other heal from this situation. 

Also be mindful that others are also experiencing grief.  Pay attention to your gut.  If something keeps nagging at you to reach out to someone please do so.  Your call or touch may be just what they need to keep holding on. My faith has helped me understand the losses in my life and allowed me to find a sense of meaning and hope after the loss. It is my prayer that each of you will find the same. 

 Healing Without Hate:  It’s a choice. It’s a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org to learn more. Wendy is a life strategist, coach, consultant, author, and speaker. You can hear her every Wednesday on Instagram Live at 12 noon PST.

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