Upland, CA
Much of my life has been an open book. I share many of my highs and lows for the purpose of trying to help and encourage others on their journey. For those who have heard me speak or read my books know the trials and tribulations I experienced as a young girl. From sexual abuse by my father and being abandoned by my mother. However, not enough has been shared about how my father turned his life around through the power of the Lord. My father had a heart attack when I was in high school and while he was in the hospital, he committed his life to Christ. He went from a life of riotous living to living a Christian life serving others. My father went from being a man of the streets to a man spreading the gospel of Christ. I believe much of this occurred from the power of prayer and because he wanted to change.
When I was a little girl, my grandmother used to make me pray each night for my parents. She often said there is power in prayer if we believe God has the power to do anything. As a youth, I did not totally understand what she was pouring into me, but she was letting me know that my prayers were not in vain. I cannot say I ever held any hatred towards my parents for what they did to me, but I was confused on why my mother would leave me and why my father would hurt me. I believe the wisdom where my grandmother taught me to pray about everything, also taught me the power of forgiveness. I think my grandmother teaching me that the bible tells us to honor our parents, and not just if they act right, gave me a heart and mind bent towards forgiveness. Prayer and forgiveness can change the hearts and minds of people, as well as heal those who have done the hurting and those who were hurt.
Recently I was having coffee with one of my dearest sister friends who is more of a sister than just a friend. As we were sharing over our cups of coffee, I shared with her how I have told my story about living through abuse from my father and abandonment from my mother, but I have not shared enough about the transition my father made in his life to become a minister and pastor of a church that focused on providing hope and help through spreading God’s good news. My friend listened deeply and then told me that more people need to hear this message and understand how people can change for the better if they want to and if they are ready. My father was a perfect example of that possibility. We all make mistakes, some worse than others, but when true redemption has occurred in one’s life, let us rejoice and acknowledge what is possible.
History has given us several examples of individuals who overcame negative issues and turned their lives around for good. One such public figure was Ryan Leaf. Ryan Leaf was a former NFL quarterback whose promising career was derailed by substance abuse and legal troubles. Leaf went through a remarkable transformation becoming a mental health advocate and using his own experiences to help others who struggled with addiction. He is even a commentator on ESPN. We say we like when an underdog makes a comeback, but when people do things that we feel are beyond redemption we shy away from believing they truly repented for their ways and deserve a second chance. I am truly grateful that before my father passed away, he was able to turn his life around for good. My father and I experienced true healing and were able to build a relationship that could only have happened with the power of prayer and forgiveness. I am a believer anyone can change.
The question I would ask is do you believe people can change? Is there someone in your life who deserves a second chance? Possibly, are you someone seeking forgiveness and hoping people will believe that you have changed and want to be given a second or even third chance? Many of us have something in our lives that we would do over if we could, but when you cannot undo what has been done, you can try to change for the better. If no one else believes you can change, never give up on yourself. Anything is possible if you believe.
Healing Without Hate: It’s a choice. It’s a lifestyle. Pass it on.
